Friday, August 15, 2014

What Oscar's and Bella's birthday looked like

Thank you to all that commented on my last post for Oscar's and Bella's birthday.

As expected, we made it through the day. It wasn't the same as years past, living in a different city and having Gus be involved, but it was what we did this year.

We began the day going to the grocery store and choosing a breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner for each child. To keep Gus involved, he was in charge of choosing Tittle's food. The grocery shopping felt rushed, because we had to be aware of Gus not getting bored, but it felt nice to be able to think about what grocery shopping with Oscar and Bella could have felt like.

We then dropped all the food off at the local food pantry, where we were able to share their story and talk about them.
We then headed home, where we watched Bella's movie, The Pirate Fairy.
After Gus woke up from nap, we didn't have time to watch Oscar's movie, Kung Fu Panda 2, so we headed to the local balloon place to choose balloons for the balloon release. Turns out that she doesn't fill her balloons with helium (huh?), so we headed to the next town (25min drive) and got our balloons there. We then released them, watched them float away, and headed to dinner.
From left to right: Firefly's pink star, Bella's leopard, Tittle's silver star and Oscar's football
Gus wanted a balloon for each of them, not just Oscar and Bella.
After dinner, and upon arriving home, we all had birthday brownies.
Tittle-infused brownies! The outside is decorated with candy stars and pink & blue sugar.
The inside contains butterscotch chips!
Can't forget the ice cream
Like I said before, the day was different than in years past, but the strong emotions were still there. I sobbed from 2:20pm to 2:50pm, which is the time frame that Oscar and Bella were both born and died. Oscar was born at 2:20pm and died at 2:30pm. Bella was born at 2:40pm and died at 2:50pm. I also sobbed during the balloon release. I like doing the release, because I like feeling like I'm sending something up to them, but every time I let go of those balloons, it feels like I'm letting them go all over again.


  1. What a beautiful way to honor and remember all of them!

    1. Thank you. Our thought is that just because they aren't physically here, it doesn't mean they can't have a positive impact on the world.

  2. Thanks for sharing. I'm glad it was okay.
    A & C's first birthday is coming up in 2 months, and I don't know what to do yet...

    1. For Oscar's and Bella's first birthday, we had a birthday party. 3 couples from the bereaved parent support group that we attended (who all lost twins) were invited. I ordered the cake from a bakery, served a simple lunch (all twin-themed foods) and we just kept each other company for the day. It wasn't until their third birthday that we started the food donation. I know others do lantern releases or balloon releases that they invite family & friends to participate in. It all depends on how you're feeling about their first birthday. Do you want it to be more private, do you want a large outpouring of support from others, do you want to do something in their memory or do something special for you and your husband to care for each other. Just remember to do what feels right for you.